let's get stoned, yo

1. And the boy Michael layeth himself down to sleep, as his head was indeed tired.

2. And the Devil crept upon him in the night and planted his seed in the side of the boy to bring to pass his wicked and evil deeds.

3. Michael rose the next morning to find his insides burning with the inferno of Hell, and cursed the demons that scorched his innards.

4. And behold, a month passed with continuing agony and pain, and the seed of the Devil bore its way to the middle of the boy.

5. Finally, the boy Michael shouted out, "I am filled with Christ's love!" and the seed expelled itself from his body, and the seed was spilt upon the earth.

The image above is my stone compared to a pencil eraser.