what's a boy to do

I'm sitting in eCamp now ... I finished my presentations and I'm watching Alex teach our staff about some of the more advanced features of Google that will be helpful to them -- like Google Scholar, Calculations, etc. But I don't have anythign to do.

I checked CNN and read that gas is expected to jump $.25 in the next few days. What the fuck is that. People are being assholes about this whole gas thing. Like the energy companies are hurting for money. I understand that the price of crude is rising -- but heaven forbid that the energy companies might actually make a little less money. I mean, dear sweet jesus. Maybe I should pray ...

Oh dear sweet jesus,
please let us have free gas, or at least gas that doesn't force me to sell sperm so I can afford to drive to work. Please give me the knowledge to convert my car to run on oxygen or water and to inspire others to do so as well so that we can leave sad and drab desert regions alone and to live in peace. Please bless me with a good get-rich-quick scheme so I can retire next year (this work this is starting to get on my nerves). Give me the ability to make others worship me and think I'm wonderful, almost Christ-like (you've done it several times before to others, just - ya know - leave out the whole cruxificition thing if you don't mind).

Oh, and I'm sorry about that thing I did the other day with that thing.

Amen.