evolution

I can't believe it's already mid-August 2005. WTF. Time has flown by so fast. I've been at Continental almost 5 months now -- and in that 5 months so much has happened to me ... I've really grown a lot and my perspective on a lot has changed, particularly my view of myself. I've always been so unsure of myself, viewed myself as undeserving, just another hack struggling to get by. And sure, I still think that half the time -- but thanks to Adam, Kevin, my mom and these projects at Continental, my programming skills have grown leaps and bounds -- and I actually enjoy doing it. Adam has been so patient with me, trying to help me to understand concepts and ways of doing things. I know he gets frustrated because my vocabulary in describing things is kind'a limited. But I really contribute a lot of my learning to him. So thank you, Adam. :)

Anothing thing that has grown a lot in the last 5 months has been my relationship with David. He's my bestfriend and I feel like I'm the luckiest boy alive to be able to have the job I do, that I enjoy doing, and being able to work daily one on one with my best friend. Things have been a little rough the past few weeks, and I was writing in my journal last nite about things and what has been going on at work -- and I realized that I so wouldn't be here where I am today if it were not for him. I met him almost 5 yeas ago, and from that point on, my life took a different route that has made me someone different than I otherwise would have been without having him in my life. His influence has brought me through a lot, taught me a lot, and helped me grown my talents. We started a business together and still run it, and we work well together. I love him a lot, and feel more than blessed to have him in my life.

I have also been healthier the past 5 months (knock on wood) than I have been in a good while. I've passed a few very small stones (small as in I wasn't aware of them until they came shooting out), but nothing that has required meds or a trip to the ER. My water intake has increased dramatically and my Dr. Pepper intake has deacreased. So three cheers for good health. :)

I've started writing a book ... nothign that I am going to go into here right now, but it is an endeavor I've thought about for several months and am finally starting out. That is one project ... I've also started getting back into doing massages again.

I graduate this January. Three more classes to go and I cannot wait to be done. To have a degree after all these years. I graduated from Ricks in 1999 with an AA -- and now, i'm almost 29, and i'll be getting my BS (and a lot of debt). But regardless, I'm proud of myself for being as dedicated as I have been to maintain a decent GPA, get my work done, and actually learn something in the process (well, except for that second Java class that Kevin did for me *cough* helped me with. :) Thanks again, Kev. You're a peach. :))

But ya know -- overall -- my life is improving. I'm taking steps to improve it finally instead of hoping it would improve itself. A little ambition goes a long way -- I think there's an analogy about a bush and barrel, but can't think of it for the life of me ... so i'll make up my own: A lush in a bush is better than a drunk in a barrel.

But again, I'd like to thank my friends -- Adam, Kevin, David, Alex, Rachel, Michael-gurl, Patrick, my mom ... for helping me these last 5 months. I love you all (yes, even you Kevin, not that you read this ...) and I'm really very very thankful that I have you all in my life.