How Many Licks Does It Take ...

I had a conversation with my friend Joz about my over lubification, and how disturbing it is that there really are all these gross flavors. I mean ... really ... Strawberry-kiwi!? Nasty!. Mint!? Maybe if i was a DoubleMint girl.

So I was like "why don't they have flavors that are actually something that could be good?" So Joz and I came up with a list of new flavors that we would like to see (so listen up ID people).

*Disclaimer, the following list is slightly offensive to Middle America.

• Popcorn (for the movies, of course)


• Garlic and Sun-dried Tomato


• Creamy Tomato Basil


• Pizza


• Pretzel and Peanut Butter


• Brownie


• Sashimi and Edamame


• Sushi (for the lesbians)


• Bacon and Eggs (for when you want him to stay thru breakfast)


• Prime Rib & Caviar (when you're datin' your sugar daddy)


• Twinkies (for all of those boys who like super chub)


• Bertie Bott's Any Flavor Lube (never know what you're gonna get...)


• Pimento Chees (for all those boys who are uncut)


• Cottage Cheese (for the boys who don't like to work out)


• Pork Rinds (for those who are carb-conscious)


• Fried Chicken (for the Dinge Queens)


• Refried Beans (for those who are Bean Queens)


• Lamb and Curry (for the Sand Queens)


• Tofu and Seaweed (for the Rice Queens)


• Cocaine (for the Snow Queen)